Are you Depressed or is your Soul just Home Sick?
After Robin Williams’s death I started thinking about depression. I have been depressed before sometimes disturbingly depressed. I understand and can empathize with the internal pain he must have been feeling to take his own life, knowing on some level the pain it would cause his family. I don’t think when someone is in this place they can rationalize any longer and I also on some level don’t think they care. I don’t mean that in a cold and calculating way, I mean it in a way that the pain is just so great and so deep that the person suffering cannot physically or emotionally care about what their actions are going to do to others. The void is that deep; the chasm in the soul is that huge. The pain is that great.
So that brings me to the thought that maybe, just maybe somewhere deep inside it isn’t just depression that is causing so many so much pain, but a home or soul sickness. If you believe like me that we are here temporarily and our true home is with God, or Spirit or whatever you want to call it and we are only here to learn and grow, is it possible for some of us that the missing our true home is just too great? And that we must get back there. I don’t think people are aware of this when in this space and I am not even saying this is true, but it did make me think.…could that be possible?
If you think about it, it could be possible. Have you ever been away from home at any point in your life and you were so homesick that you could barely function? Imagine being a sensitive soul coming to this place and feeling so deeply the intensity of our Earth. I believe for some souls it is just too much and the longing for the peaceful, loving home in which we came, becomes too great. Imagine after all the therapy, medications, meditations, and resources you have tried to handle the depression nothing you have tried works, and that pain is still immense. Maybe that is how Robin felt; maybe that is how many people feel. When you have tried so many things and it doesn’t work or it’s only a temporary fix and seeing so much suffering and pain in the world, you lose hope. And when you have tried everything you can think of and lose all hope, it’s over and the decision to leave has been made. That’s when the soul or home sickness takes over.
Maybe that is why for some all the resources don’t work; maybe that is why people like Philip Seymour Hoffman goes back to heroin after 25 years of being clean. The home sickness or soul sickness is just so great that they can’t take it any longer and they have to numb the pain or end the pain.
I believe some people are just too sensitive for this world, and usually those people are the artists or geniuses that we see. They need an outlet for their feelings and that is why so many are so talented and brilliant, they must expunge all that is inside of them.
This is just my theory or feeling. I pray for our world every day to be lifted up in love, peace and harmony.
Wishing everyone happiness inside…
xoxo ~ Melisa